college football week 5 wrap up
the pounding on the door woke him up. it took a second or two to realize it was morning, the sun was up, and he was still drunk. very drunk. stumbling to the door he opened it. two thugs pushed their way inside. the larger of the two shut the door and stood by it.
the smaller one spoke.
’so where were you last night? it looks like getting drunk on your sorry ass. and that’s no excuse. there are no excuses. you know the rules. payment is due on bets at midnight sharp. pay up now plus another $1,000 in vig for our trouble. don’t fucking piss don vincenzo off any more than he already is.’
standing there in his under ware, head down looking at the floor he thought, good thing i’m still drunk. maybe the broken bones won’t hurt so bad.
what an abysmal weekend for picks. the above scenario will probably occur in a few places today or over the next few days. it’s what happens when you get really stupid and take some internet douche bags picks to your local ’sports authority’ and lay the rent money on the line.
3 for 8. 18 for 34 over all. barely keeping my head above water. at least i’m smart enough to not take my own advice.
what happened? it was one of those weekends where the points weren’t covered or in the case of some top 25 teams just losing out right. the game of the week, cal and oregon, was a depressing defensive struggle the first half. cal finally putting a damper on the rabid duck crowd in their home pond. cal looks to be for really real. my childhood favorites lost a week or two sooner than i expected. i wonder if dan fouts got hammered last night?
ucla at oregon st turned into to an easy win for the bruins. the beavers just never really got into the game until it was too late. ucla gets the golden domers next at home. more on that train wreck this wednesday.
usc and washington should prove what i’ve been saying here and elsewhere for years. ty willingham is a damn good coach and should have the huskies back up on top or near the top of the pac 10 in a year or so. bringing them back into the national picture for the first time since the, don james days. that is minus his recruiting scandals and assorted other stuff. pete carroll needs a haircut and for some reason he looked like a new born kitten agog at the whole deal for most of the game. no idea what’s up there. clint brushbugger remains a crappy announcer. why is abc bringing up keith jackson every week? are they some sort of sadists? making us remember keith and just how good the guy was while we sit and suffer through clint. crap.
arizona st looks like they might be for real as well by handling the trees of stanford rather easily. the meat of their schedule looms. just how large remains to be seen.
ok. that’s it for week 5. the week 6 picks are up on wednesday morning. i have to go, someone is pounding on the door.
jmh
more of the wii in mii
those of you who have been following my wii game playing saga, yes, it’s been awhile, will maybe remember that i was very unhappy with the nintendo wii/ea sports, tiger woods pga tour 2007 edition, or the game with his face and name on the damn thing from last year. that game is still a rather large piece of stinky whale crap stuck to the bottom of your golf spikes. if you are insane, you can still find it these days on the shelves of most video game stores for a bit under $30. buy it for someone you hate. i traded mine in on the new game and got $12 off the new version’s sticker price, an ok deal.
amazingly enough the tiger woods pga tour 2008 edition is pretty good. i’ve been playing it for a couple of weeks now with none of the problems the other game dished out. well, so far no major problems with this version. that’s not to say this version of the game doesn’t have a few troubles but it’s miles ahead of the 2007 game. my biggest complaint so far is the difficulty in getting a decent swing at a ball around the green. short chip shots are a crap shoot. the ball either goes way over the pin or 2 feet in front of you. that takes some of the fun away but there’s ways around that, like just hit the green from the fairway or the tee or putting the ball from the fringe. putting has been no problem at all right from the start. putting in the 2007 game was a major problem.
the other main gripe i have is the practice modes are still an arcade game. fine for kids and gamesters but us old school guys just want a bucket of balls and some open space to hit the damn things around. just practice, not play some stupid arcade golf game. surely there must be room in the program for a simple practice area where you can hone your skills with all the clubs. tiger, are you listening?
the graphics are still stellar but they weren’t the problem with last years model. lots of courses to play and they are the best of the lot. supposedly tiger’s favorites, firestone, doral, pebble beach, riviera, which i still find amusing as he hasn’t played the la open in years because he doesn’t like the grass or something. plus a number of other famous courses are available for play.
this edition of the game is, in my opinion, still not user friendly but it is getting better. i don’t know, maybe it’s me, just being an old school golfer plus an old stooge might be the problem. at least with this game there are no glitches when crunching the crap out of a ball off the tee. also with this game it’s much easier to line all your shots up from anywhere on the course. there’s some nifty sound effects and some other stuff which are ok but in the long run they are just battery drainers.
i prefer just playing one of the courses and ripping away, which can be done in the play now mode. for the more ‘gamester’ inclined there are all sorts of hoops to jump through in order to ‘unlock’ courses and other stuff. the ‘tiger challenge’ is the main avenue for that route. the tiger challenge is a series of challenges you have to pass in order to unlock courses and earn some sort of player ‘rep’. the problem with that is once you start a block of challenges i don’t think you can save what you have passed if you want to quit right in the middle. maybe you can but i don’t think so. plus you really wouldn’t want to be half way thru one of the challenges and end up losing what you have and starting over again.
i went through the first challenge series. well, twice. i lost the last challenge and had to start over again from the beginning. it’s not that it was hard it’s just time consuming. in fact they make it rather easy for you to get through the first group of challenges. that is unless you screw up, then it bites you in the ass, big time.
i’m more than happy to just play the courses and earn some bucks to buy better clubs and other equipment rather than go through all the hassle of the challenge. ah, yes, the final challenge is 18 holes against tiger at pebble beach. however, you can play him anytime you want in the play now mode and on any course the game has to offer. i suppose, i will get through the challenge stuff eventually but for now i’m very content shooting under par at firestone and doral or any of the other courses. yes, under par, i have the game set in the easy mode and it will stay there until i get bored with it. even in the easy mode the game isn’t that easy and it’s a work out if you tee it up and take a real golf swing at the ball or else where on the course. after 36 holes, or more, you know you’ve had your exercise for the day.
ok. so, here it is. the tiger woods pga tour 2008 golf game is a definite winner, buy it. it isn’t a 10 and i may run into or come across some nasty glitch down the road but so far that hasn’t happened. by this time with the 2007 version i was already so pissed off i didn’t want to play the game anymore. this years version is a 7 or an 8. the 2007 version, in comparison, was and is, a 2 or 3. if you enjoy the game of golf, the tiger woods pga tour 2008 nintendo wii game is for you.
jmh
of mice and men (with apologies to steinbeck)
it didn’t look like it was going to be one of those days but it turned out to be anyway. just another day for the best laid plans of mice and men.
the whole thing got rolling at breakfast. g/f was home taking a vacation day. what do you want to eat for breakfast? um, egg rolls, but not fried. we’ll nuke em first then put them in the toaster oven. yeah, ok, sounds good. i’ll get them going. the toaster oven, however, wasn’t cooperating. the fucker was only working half way. time for a new one.
i tossed the old one out and g/f says since we are going out for the toaster oven i want some new toilet seats for the toilets. fine, ok. i’m thinking the damn things are fairly new but from years of experience i sorta know not to argue. sometimes.
we figure this will be just a one stop shopping trip plus a quick stop for a few groceries. we know what size toaster oven we need. it can only be so big or it won’t fit where it’s been for like ever. i’m even bringing along the tape measure just to make sure it all works out. it’s 9am and off we go.
of course the toilet seat deal is a bust but we find a nice toaster oven and the measurements seem to be just right. cool. well, we stop at another half dozen places looking at toilet seats. none of which suit the g/f for a variety of reasons. by this time it’s almost noon so we decide to give up on the seat search and go home.
the new toaster oven is a very nice stainless steel model with all of the new bells and whistles. only thing is the new toaster oven is too fucking big for it’s spot. just a quarter of an inch or less to fucking big. oh, we could have shoved the damn thing into it’s spot but it would just mean trouble in the long run. we take it back and get our money back then hit the road again looking for another toaster oven.
we go back to the same stores we had already been to looking for the seats but this time we are looking for a toaster oven, again. none of the damn things is the right size. g/f is like maybe we should just go back and get the same model from the first store and just jam it in place. i say no to that deal. i’m not walking back in that store to buy the same fucking toaster oven i originally bought, then returned, then go back and buy it again. jesus, if i were the store i’d call the mental health cops and the real ones as well.
when we finally got home yesterday afternoon around 3pm we still didn’t have a toaster oven. they are all too damn large. now the plan is to rearrange shit in the kitchen in order to make room for the larger size. thankfully, we found 3 possibilities at a store just down the street. at least no driving all over town again. or that’s my hope.
the toilet seats? g/f went on line after dinner last night and found just what she was looking for. she’s buying 3. one for each throne. if only the rest of the day had been so easy.
jmh
ducks and beavers fans beavers and ducks fans
the past few days both of you guys have made this old college football hand very happy. you folks have put my blog hit count up into pretty much undreamable numbers, thank you all very much. in particular i want to thank who ever it was who linked me to www.ducksprotsnews.com and www.beaversports.com you fans are amazing. i’m a native so calif guy and i love the trojans, yeah well, sue me. however, the oregon schools are very close to my heart. it’s one of those west coast things. i know you understand. the pac 10 rules and the oregon schools help make it so. thank you all so very much from the bottom of my heart. all of you have made me very happy. i hope some of you stick around and read the the regular usual drivel i dish out. that being said, the usual college football picks arrive here on wednesday morning. your amazing participation is something i will always cherish. thank you. go ducks!!!! go beavers!!!!
music provided by, janis joplin with big brother and the holding co, ‘piece of my heart’.
jmh
college football week 5 picks
i’m 15 for 26, tepid at best. so just like some degenerate gambler after a sorta hosing at whatever their game of choice might be that week, day, hour or minute before, they want to double up to make up for that loss. in that desperate spirit of things i’m doing 8 games this week. i almost started humming that old beatles tune. at any rate, remember i’m going by a collection of the odds from one site and i found another with a collection as well. they are all pretty much in the same ball park. if they change between now and saturday or when ever, what i have here is what i go by. new readers, just remember if you take what i deal out and try to make some money on it and lose. tough shit. you are stupid and got what you deserve.
so miss at boise, boise up 10 points. boise is pretty much unbeatable at home. it’s the blue turf plain and simple. so miss is one of those teams that on occasion will rain on your parade, big time. they rain on the blue turf. so miss covers or wins. this will probably be a fun game to watch.
miss st at so carolina, spurrier’s boys up 13 1/2. this is another fun one to watch. so carolina should win this one by a touchdown or 2, no problem, i hope. take so carolina.
notre dame at purdue, purdue up 22. the hapless domers find themselves in trouble again this weekend. i’m not going into why as you’ve read and heard them all before. purdue wins by the 22 or more.
byu at new mexico, byu by 5 1/2. yes, i love the old wac. new mexico was supposed to suck this year. byu has done a fine job so far. then why are they only up by 5.5? questions i have no answers for, so that being said take byu.
usc at washington, usc by 20 1/2. coach ty is in for a rumble this weekend. good team that just isn’t quite ready for pasting a team the likes of the trojans. usc wins by at least the 20.5. however, if they get lazy or stupid they won’t cover and could lose. usc by the 20.5.
ucla at oregon st, toss up. a toss up because the bruins have no clue who is starting at qb. injuries abound at that spot. though the new kid had some nice numbers last week. oregon st can and will beat you if you aren’t careful. so with coach karl’s tendency to do stupid stuff at all the wrong times, oregon st wins.
ariz st at stanford, ariz st by 14. this one is put up or shut up for the old oregon hand, erickson. ariz st is the surprise of the pac 10 so far this year. they quietly gone about their business and are 4 and 0. stanford as the spoiler. not this weekend. ariz st wins by the 14.
calif at oregon, calif by 5 1/2. this is the pac 10 match of the week. it should be lights out football with a final score to rival the old dead wac. i love these kinds of games. defense? i have no time for it. i have points to put on the board. oregon is pretty tough to beat at home. and if they trot out some bizarre color combo for their uniforms this week it just might throw the bears for a loop. how’s that for scientific logic? plus the ducks fans are probably the most rabid in the pac 10. it’s still not time for them to lose. ducks win and or cover. go ducks!!!
there ya go, an 8 game week. remember this is just for fun and using these picks for a shot at a better life or vacation retreat would be borderline depravity. keep your money in your wallets where it belongs.
jmh
cartoon ass
i’ve always been a fan of cartoon ass. um, well, let me make things perfectly clear, that would be, female cartoon ass. ever since i was a kid i’ve had this thing for a nice female cartoon character’s ass. not all female cartoon character’s ass, just some of them. i’ve added this to the ‘love’ and ‘ relationships’ tags along with the others because no matter how brief the encounter, it was love and a relationship.
i really don’t know how or where it got started. all i know is it just did. maybe with disney’s tinkerbell though i suppose that might almost be considered some sort of venal sin or something even more untoward. so maybe i shouldn’t go there. uncle walt wouldn’t like it. he certainly didn’t like how the wrap party went for his cartoon movie, ’snow white’, and he was the guy throwing the party. but that’s a major drift of major proportions. snow white, by the way had a nice ass.
let’s just say the lovely female cartoon ass fetish has always been with me. it was much more pronounced when i was a kid. back when things were much more censorfied and things hadn’t progressed into what we have now a days. back when i was a kid, of around 10 or 11 years old, a kid with raging hormones that needed appeasing, slaking the rampant lust was always a top priority. in those days of, ike, and the post ww2/korea era, porn was what you made of it. oh, it was around but at my age it wasn’t available like it is now. you had to take what you could get.
a very early cartoon ass would of course be, betty boop. i’m still not exactly sure what was going on there but she had shit going for her. she also used to be all over the tv during the olden days of half assed decent daytime tv. or take alice mitchell, dennis the menace’s mom, she had a nice ass, still does for that matter. then there was dagwood bumstead’s wife, blondie, stellar ass, my friends. wilma flintstone, as well. veronica, from the archie comics. get the picture? yes, i was a demented little fuck, huh? what can i say? other than a crazed 11 year old boy’s masturbation needs knew no bounds.
then of course one of my favorite cartoon ass places was the la times film section. something i just stumbled across way back when the times still ran ads for the burgeoning adult film industries movies. cartoon ass in ads the likes that hank ketchum never imagined. where’s john? he’s in his room reading the times. oh, good.
then of course, when things stretched out a bit and playboy hit the streets crazed young boys never looked back. but cartoon ass was still there. vargas and his really nice renditions of female cartoon ass. just great stuff indeed. or perhaps some nice cartoon ass out of ‘true’ magazine or something along similar lines.
what got me thinking about cartoon ass again were the new wii games. yeah, what can i say? in one of the games, the g/f’s character, she designed for herself, looks sorta like the lady on ‘house hunters’, suzanne whang, but with a really nice ass. it’s amazing. there are other lady characters wandering in and out of the game as well. all of them with stellar asses. then there’s the new tiger woods 2008 golf game. same deal. there’s some women golfer’s you can compete against and they all have an amazing ass. distractingly amazing asses.
am i the only person noticing this stuff? or have we just become to inured or ho hum about cartoon ass? or maybe you never really noticed them to begin with. as you can see i did and i’m still noticing them. a fine female ass whether it be for real or a cartoon is one of the perks of male life or at least mine. i’m going to look at them until the day i die. real or cartoon female ass, doesn’t matter, i love ‘em.
below is an example of some nice cartoon ass. it’s a ww2 propaganda cartoon, supplied by my friend, dfr. i was going to add some other stuff but i didn’t want any copyright troubles or in the case of the propaganda stuff, an obsenity beef.

music this morning provided by, the rolling stones, ‘out of our heads’.
jmh
the waiting game
we spent a good deal of time this weekend eating outside the home. we also spent a good deal of time this weekend waiting for food to arrive at the table. it’s not something we like to do. just sit and wait for food to arrive. then wait some more.
the first dining experience was this past friday. we got a flyer in the mail concerning a new chinese place not far from where we live. a very ambitious menu that looked pretty good. had we known that they had only been open for one day we would have probably waited to try the place out. g/f says you know where this place is? yeah, i think so. we were going to home depot for something and we would stop by on the way home and get some take out. of course the place wasn’t the one i was thinking of. so we had to hunt it down but that wasn’t too bad. we found it to be just a small hole in the wall with a number of folks already waiting.
we placed our order and were told it would be 15 minutes. we were still waiting 35 minutes later. it was actually a pretty good show with a few babes wandering in and out. the fucking waiting was not. at one point i was worried the cook was going to just up and quit and we would never get any food. the owner had come in and started yelling at the poor chef, in chinese, telling him he was ruining his business with his slow cooking. g/f translated. actually it really wasn’t the chefs fault. it was the dumb ass owner who had this menu that really wasn’t suited for such a small place and the kitchen was way too small to pump stuff out. only room for 2 people in the place at one time. we both agreed that the menu has to go or the owner will be gone. soon. the chef will go before the owner. oh, yeah, the food wasn’t that good. it’s still up in the air if we will ever go back there.
saturday night we took the nephews and one of the girlfriends to a high end place we’ve been going to for a number of years. superb food and a nice wine list along with a trendy atmosphere. the food is still superb along with the wine selection but for some reason the service was just ghastly. the owner running around doing stuff the waiters should have been doing and the waiters probably working in the kitchen. it was one of those deals where it’s sorta obvious that the guy is in trouble. cutting back on the help in hopes of saving some money. plus, he wasn’t ready for a busy night. most of the tables were occupied and we all sat there way too long waiting for food to arrive. though, like i said, when it did arrive it was outstanding. will we go back? that’s the question. i don’t know. some of the appetizers are just too damn good to just forget about. curried oysters on the half shell with caviar. fucking amazing. the thing is, will the place still be open if we decide we want to go back?
yesterday’s lunch was a traditional chinese banquet. it’s was for g/f’s parents anniversary. a pretty good chinese restaurant that we had all been to on previous occasions along with banquets as well. things started out pretty good the dishes arriving when they should with no waiting. then there’s maybe just as bad the dishes arriving too soon and they begin to stack up on the table. which is worse? ah, waiting too long. as the place got busier the dishes started taking longer to come out of the kitchen. the men began to get restless. we got up one by one and paced around in the room we had. grandpa, even got up and wandered out of the room, promptly getting lost as he is want to do. all the pacing and grandpa getting confused didn’t help with dishes coming out of the kitchen. the place was just too damn busy and we still had 5 more courses coming, not counting the cake. it seemed like we would be there until this morning. the waiter was very sorry about stuff and the owner tried to get things moving but nothing much changed until the crowd thinned out. we had been there for so long it was decided one of the courses should just be forgotten. it was a chinese dessert soup. all in all the food was pretty good and grandma was very impressed with it but the service was just god awful.
i guess the point being, is this what the restaurant biz is coming to? crappy service in order to save some money? or just crappy service period? it’s not a good thing, regardless.
jmh
college football week 4 wrap-up
3 for 7 this week. not good but then i need to stay away from certain teams and or games. one of those teams will be air force. sadly, the falcons are not playing well enough to even cover any action. so i’m going to avoid them down the road. yeah, right.
i may stay away from alabama as well. 2 weeks of nail biters is just too much for this oldster then they loose. it’s sorta odd when you want to avoid one of your favorite teams. but it’s for the best i suppose. uh, huh.
my question for the week is the big 10 as bad as they seem to be? or is it just me? wisconsin, unable to soundly put away iowa seems to me there might be some trouble in madison and the big 10 in general.
the ducks and the bears roll on. good games by both schools. the pac 10 has some gamers this year. possibly the best in the country but it’s early yet.
the best game of the day was the usc washington st game, if only for the fact, keith jackson, showed up in a cameo roll dishing out the line-ups. i miss keith and wish him well. he’s probably the best football announcer ever, followed closely by the old nfl and college hand, al derogatis. at least dan fouts was back in the saddle and his play calling gets better with each game.
15 for 26 so far. nothing to get excited about and hopefully you haven’t been taking my picks to whoever as that would be very dumb and you would have received what you deserve. this weeks games up on wednesday morning.
jmh
it was a fair day
we went to the la county fair today. we hadn’t been in a number of years. usually it’s just bloody awfully hot and nasty this time of year and it was a bit earlier in the month. however, it’s cooled off considerably and there was even a shower this morning that bodes more rain tomorrow afternoon. fine we need the stuff. almost desperately.
the la county fair has been around for, jesus, god only knows how many years. it’s one of those things that you go to as a kid and remember fondly but as an adult it’s one of those…well, we haven’t gone in a few years maybe we should go this year deals. of course, g/f is up for it most of the time. though when it’s hot and nasty and we go it’s like ah, no thanks the next few years. fine by me.
today’s trip probably had the nicest weather i can remember. 75 or so tops with some really nice overhead cloud action going down as well. as an armature weather doppler stooge i’m thinking at some point we just might get some nice rainfall tomorrow. bring it on.
we used to eat at the fair. yeah, used to. the bbq’s smell nice and all but the getting down to the eating of them is like, hmmm, this is shit and i just paid almost an arm and a leg for the crap. or well, lets have the pizza in this place. we did that twice and each time was just ghastly. you learn things on a curve i suppose. so today we had some nice chinese beef noodle soup and a couple of chive cakes with a shit pot of chives, glass noodles, egg in a chinese deli before we went to the fair. good shit to be sure. the only thing we ate at the fair was a fairly decent chocolate and peanut covered ice cream bar. that was dessert.
the rest of the time was spent wandering around looking for something that you can barely find on the internet so why would it be at the fair? good damn question and one i asked several times, mostly under my breathe. the whole time under a greasy cloud off bbq grease smoke. i love bbq just as much as the next guy but when assaulted by the smell of countless bbqs and the ubiquitous turkey leg on a grill smell along with the crappy ribs, beef, and chicken it gets to be…um, i’m getting a bit queasy from all the fat in the air and grease in general to the point that our semi buddhist like eating habits maybe should get more buddhist like. ya think? well, that’s not going to happen real soon as our semi vegetarian eating life style is just fine. a growing boy, of pushing 60, needs some red meat or chicken or the other white meat upon occasion. fish doesn’t count. count on it.
it’s probably a good thing that greasy bbq smoke doesn’t contain cholesterol. though i’m sure the talking heads of tvland will come up with some sort of cancerous connection very soon. something we will all come to, yes, come to, come to…make us want to drink more and more. yes, that’s it. god, the horror of it all. greasy bbq smoke causes terminal stupidity and testicular and/or breast cancer. what the fuck? exactly.
at any rate, after hours of wandering around the place that hasn’t changed much since our last visit or not even that much since my first visit as a wee lad, loo those eons ago, we stumbled back to the car and left.
i must say the g/f can soldier on. bad knee and all. she is a trooper. she has shown the soldier deal on numerous occasions in our travels. from hawaii, and a walk that looked like a piece of cake that turned out to be miles of forced marching. then today and a walk in the greasy smoke of the la county fair. she can soldier with the best of them. marching wise. well, yeah, she went to bed early mumbling about stuff and can i get out of bed in the morning?
yes, this was written last night.
jmh
a bakery on wheels
yesterday morning i read a blog about bakeries in nyc and the total lack of them now a days. it got me thinking about the old days around here in so california.
for many years the helms bakery in downtown los angeles had a fleet of delivery trucks that brought fresh baked goods right to your front door. yeah, it’s true, from downtown all the way out east to the capital of the dreaded inland empire, san bernardino. to points north and west way up into the san fernando valley. they never sold anything in a store, just out of the back of their trucks. the photos below culled by my friend, dfr, show the really old delivery trucks. helms and the trucks were around for a long long time from 1931 up until 1969. at one point in time they were the largest employer in the city of los angeles. that in itself is an incredible fact.
though the trucks or delivery wagons i remember, as a kid, were more like a small panel truck painted in the same colors. sadly, no photos of them could be found. they would cruise through the neighborhood and use their distinctive whistle to let you know they were around. plus, you stuck a sign up in the window to let them know you wanted something that day.
it was like christmas morning when the truck pulled into the driveway. i’d rush outside in order to be there as soon as the back door was open and the delivery man pulled out the long wooden trays packed with fresh baked goods. the smell was just amazing. maybe even better than being in a bakery because of the sheer novelty of it, bakery smells coming from a truck and it’s parked in your very own front yard. a novelty that never wore itself out.
i think by somewhere around 1962ish helms was having some financial trouble and had cut back on it’s fleet of trucks. i don’t re-call seeing them much after that sorta date anywhere around in the inland empire, though i may be mistaken. i think the awe inspiring deal behind the adventure just got too expensive. however, it’s still something i will always fondly remember. that fresh bakery smell coming out of the back of a truck, was and is, still one of life’s little pleasures tucked nicely away amongst the fried synapses of my brain and other semi faded memories.
| A Divco-Twin by the orginaly Twin Coach Company | |
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dfr, found a photo this morning of the wooden drawers in the trucks. 3 of them were refridgerated.
jmh

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