wishful thinking

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this first appeared back in february of 08. i’d forgotten i’d written it. though with yet another election looming soon i’ve already voted. the ass hats just don’t know it yet. for you see i sent my official absentee ballot material through the shredder. it’s been six years since i wrote this and we’re not any closer to it happening than we were six years ago. a sad thing.


lots of wishful thinking on my part over the years on lots of different stuff.  anything from the chance meeting of say, heidi klum, where we immediately fall into to bed and live happily ever after.  or perhaps, the twice weekly i’m going to be the next california super lottery winner wishful thinking.  i think the odds on either of those things happening are probably both in the same ballpark.  a ballpark with very long odds and over 375 feet down each line to the foul pole. 

i’m not the first person to wishful think either of the two i mentioned.  not by a long shot.  male or female.  for either.  yeah, heidi’s that hot.  drifting here.  no, it’s the political season of the witch, no, not necessarily, lady machill.  it’s just this season of endless political weirdness that over the years has become just annoying and nauseating and finally culminating with my withdrawing from all elections.

i have some wishful thinking that might drag me back into the fray.  the problem being is that’s just what it is because the humps in charge of both major parties and probably the fringe groups as well, wouldn’t like it.  oh, maybe some of the fringe guys might but the big sex and money boys and girls would probably have a collective massive coronary if it came to pass.  which might not be a bad idea.  then we could just start over from scratch.  more drifting.  perhaps.

i’m not the only person to come up with this wishful thought as it’s been tossed around every now and again over the years but it never goes anywhere.  sadly.  big money wants nothing to do with it.  i think it scares them.  good.  they scare me.  daily. 

i think the time has come to scare the bejesus out of them for a change.  this sad slate of presidential candidates would seem like the perfect time for my wishful thought to maybe make it past the blossom stage and give fruition to something that should have happened years ago. 

oh, i’m sure all the candidates are probably sorta nice folks.  i mean maybe you could probably invite them all over to the house for some grub, massive amounts of dago red, and mah jong.  though they would all have to promise no politics.  the only problem is they all, would at some point, renege and start campaigning.  worse yet, while working the room glad handing anyone in sight, they would be spilling heirloom organic cabernet all over the living room furniture and in general just being boorish dinner guests.  the whole sad deal would probably end up being worse than letting the local canvassing scientology crew in for a chat and a brew.  god, the horror.  i don’t know if they do that but just the thought of it scares me on lots of levels. 

the point of this madness?  for those of you that have stuck it out here it is…none of the above.  yep.  that’s it.  none of the above needs to be added to every ballot in the country.  it’s time is way the hell over due. it’s simple in it’s purity and gives those of us something to vote for other than the ever ubiquitous ‘lesser of two evils’.  cause that’s what it generally comes down to in any election.  in particular a presidential election.  regardless who is running. 

sadly it’s not going to happen.  although i think it needs to be brought up and hammered home to our elected elitist that they serve us and not their pocketbook or summer home where ever the hell it is.  it’s time we that have made ourselves the disenfranchised get our vote back.  sure we quit voting on our own accord.  however, they were the ones that pissed us off so much we just up and said, fuck this, i ain’t voting anymore every again for any of you witless bunch of money grubbing oily sanctimonious swine. 

problem is they have all forgotten just who the hell it is they serve.  they all think they are there just to serve themselves up their own personal money tree.  yes, they are the folks that actually have that tree.  the tree that your dad asked your mom if she thought money grew on trees tree.  well, it does exist.  you just have to get elected to any public office in the land.  it also comes with the keys to the new tony soprano model caddy escalade AND your very own 23 year old smokin’ hot mistress.  boy, howdy.  makes a man want to run for office, don’t it?

imagine the chagrin some november after the votes have been tallied and candidate A gets 12%.  candidate B gets 12%.  the fringe guys and gals get their usual 1% and lo and behold, none of the above, wins with a whopping 75%.  you snicker.  though it could happen.  no, by god, it should happen.  it’s time we the fed up disenfranchised take our vote back.  take our vote back and vote for none of the above in any damn election we feel like.  we need to badger our elected swine into letting us vote for none of the above.  why not?  what’s the problem with that?  why is it just wishful thinking?

what?  what the hell?  who the fuck are you anyway? why no way, sonny boy, we can’t do that.  why that would be un-american.  say, just what kind of commie pinko nazi muslim are you any the ways?  by all that’s holy, you gotta be one of em or all of em for even suggesting such a vile idea.  why, why, i think i’ll let my bodyguards shoot you for bringing that sick deviant idea up in my very own official officially sanctioned official office.  ed, jack.  take this commie nazi muslim scum out back and do what needs to be done. 

so like here’s the deal.  call your congressperson and senator.  be polite.  ya hear?  yeah, well, hopefully he has no clue you don’t vote.  then tell whoever answers the phone we need the none of the above clause added to All ballots in this once great nation.  simple easy.  sure they will laugh and hang up.  come on, the caddy and smokin’ hot mistress need a good hot wax.  so call again.  give them the same rap.  if enough of you supposed americans do this.  we will get the none of the above clause on all ballots across america for every election.  it’s time has come. 



Who Are the Brain Police? ~ Frank Zappa & The Mothers of Invention ~

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the above mentioned song appeared on the mothers first LP, ‘freakout’, in 1968. to say it was well ahead of it’s time would be like the proverbial pot, kettle, and black name calling adage. what follows about the song, Who Are the Brain Police?, was gleaned/lifted from wikipedia:

The song’s structure was described in detail by AllMusic:

“Simply put, it is weird and creepy. A chorus of living-dead voices supports a slow and sloppy waltz beat. Lyrics make numerous references to melting plastic and chromium and repeatedly ask the question found in the song’s title (answered by the brainless chorus). Halfway through, the song breaks into a fast-paced bridge; the same happens in the coda, which includes a kazoo solo.”

“The song was stated to be a “direct defiance of top 40 radio.” Repetitive lyrics were noted as part of this “defiance.” The song was also cited by Mojo magazine as “one of the scariest songs to ever emerge from the rock psyche.” While comparing it to Kafka, Mojo described the song as “a vision of contemporary America where personal identity and individuality is erased.”

interesting, what? yep. perhaps weird and creepy but the song is much more than frank railing against the radio and music industry that wanted very little to do with him, his music or ideas.

a couple of days ago i was sitting in a dentist office reading magazines while waiting for the brown eyed girl’s appointment to be over. some of the magazines were ok but a bit borderline in their finger wagging. ‘time’ magazine sent me over the edge and into an orwellian free fall. thankfully, it’s a magazine i rarely read let alone page through.

yes, kids, long dead uncle frank pretty much nailed it. we’ve indeed become that contemporary america where we’re told what and what not to do and when and when not to do it. he also nailed a bunch of other stuff musically as well 40 years ago long before ‘american idol’ or ‘the voice’ hit the airways. though ‘the voice’ does it’s damnedest to distance itself from what a pop singer ought to look like. sorta. but that isn’t why i’m here.

don’t do that. do this. do that. not this. say this. not that. believe this. don’t believe that. don’t ever say that! eat this. not that. it’s going to kill you. this won’t kill you. or at least it won’t this week. next week? meh. vote this way. god forbid, not THAT way! think this. never that. buy this. not that. read this. never that. you really fucking need this. your government would never ever lie to you. what’s the matter with you, boy?

yeah, we’ve been erased. or our minds have. it’s only a matter of time before we ourselves will be erased for not toeing the line. count on it. your personal identity is already gone or has been stolen. individuality? that disappeared along with the so called freedoms we once had. if you haven’t noticed you haven’t been paying attention. we are all suffering from all the brain policing that’s been going on for years. though most hardly notice the day in and day out nonstop barrage of swill and we know what’s best for you crapola. it’s as if we’re all too fucking stupid to figure anything out or entitled to form our own opinions about damn near everything on our own anymore. for good or bad.

ok. sure some of you are so fucking stupid you need to be spoon fed every damn thing even if it is wrong or wrong headed. after all it is properly PC and has been vetted by legions of assorted loons, dumb asses, hacks, hustlers, and politicians from both sides of the aisle. fine. screw it. just leave me out of your fucking equation and it’s related insanity. i’m not even gonna say please. just do it. yeah, sure, like that’s gonna happen even if i say, please.

when the bells start tolling don’t say they aren’t for you because they are. by the time that circus/scenario rolls into your town it will already be too late.


something to ponder while waiting for the other shoe to drop(?)

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i took my ride to the toyota dealer the other day.  it was time for some scheduled maintenance and then there’s that ‘problem’ toyota is having which needed to be addressed as well.  toyota has said any number of things about the ‘problem’.  a problem which has lots of us folks wondering if the car we are riding in will be worth anything at all down the road.  the safety issue doesn’t concern me that much.  one, i know what to do.  i knew that before toyota started yammering about what to do if the deal went down.  two, given the number of their cars on the road and the number of times it’s occurred the odds are slim.  and in my favor, well, so far, that anything is going to happen to me in particular.  yeah, so far.

at any rate, the dealership i go to is owned by former football great, john elway.  whenever i go there i’m always hoping it will be one of the days he’s actually at the place.  i mean he has a parking spot out front with his name on it and the workers do say he does show up on occasion.  i figure we could toss the old pigskin around out on the lawn or something.  i could run a few patterns.  well, make that sorta walk/run a few patterns and he could fire the pigskin at me.  hopefully, not disabling me in the process.  ah, dreams.  and i’m drifting.

the place was busier than i’ve ever seen it.  folks and cars stacked up everywhere.  i’m sure that’s probably the scene at most toyota dealers all over the world.  a madhouse.  i had an appointment so things weren’t too bad, though the whole deal took much longer than usual.  it gave me time to think about stuff while i read a bit and people watched.  i was thinking, what if…

the tiny village was quiet except for the sound of the crackling fire.  the smell of fatty lamb hung in the air as the platoon of green berets made their way out of the ville and on to the next.  two men standing in a doorway smiled slightly as the soldiers moved further into the distance.  once the troops were out of sight they moved back inside the hut and sat by the fire.

the americans are stupid.

yes, but we’ve always known that.

hand me the knife, i’m still hungry.

they were quiet as they started to eat again.  the whole village remained quiet.  their two guests were very important people and the villagers didn’t want to disturb them in any way.  the men began talking again.

our plan is working.  soon the others will follow.

we learned much from the north vietnamese.  americans, as well as the rest of the world, have no patience.  we have patience.  and we have true believers on our side.  believers who will do anything to make allah the one and only true god.

all praise to allah.

your plan to infiltrate capitalist corporations was brilliant and is working even better than expected.

yes, it took time but time is on our side.  time and allah.

all praise to allah.

you know, my brother, when i first thought of it i couldn’t imagine that it was going to be this successful.  i mean, a simple plan is always the best.  several engineers in several different jobs in some of the biggest capitalist corporations in the world.  a simple thing, several small glitches programed into and buried inside electronics and computers that are almost impossible to find.  glitches that are beginning to bring down the auto giant toyota.  soon, others will follow.

god is great.  all praise to allah.

yeah, strange thoughts while sitting and waiting at my local toyota dealership.


the strange case of the bcs

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i’ve been messing with this one for a few days now.  i’m angry.  not at what i’ve written, even though it might be hard to follow.  but then what else is new as far as my stuff goes?  no, i’m angry at college football, tv networks, congress and just about everyone else as well.    

the years first bcs computerized nonsense poll came out last weekend after the games.  we get another one after the games this week and after every other one until the season is over.  those of you that follow and love college football have many reasons to dislike the bcs poll on numerous levels.  me too.  especially after seeing boise st and cincinnati crouching just under the radar for a shot at the national championship game.  a shot i’m not real happy about.  but then i’m old and old school.

however, with my frazzled synapses and mis-firing neurons i’d forgotten all about what went down after last season or maybe even earlier.  i haven’t a clue as to an exact date.  a very sad state of affairs in both cases.  several schools, most notably utah and boise st, got the hairballs in washington dc to hold hearings on the seemingly unfair deal that is the bcs and their big money games at the end of the year.  sen orrin hatch, was the most visible and he yammered about fairness and other such dumbness.

dumbness, like giving a third tier school, such as boise st, a shot at the national title game if they went 12 and oh.  our wonderful government has nothing better to do than stick it’s collective nose into places it has no business.  college football being one of those premiere areas.  though our esteemed leader has said he’d like to see a playoff in college football.  hopefully, he will keep his and congresses nose out of the deal.  the bcs is bad enough right now without further meddling by those lame bozos.

their meddling, so far, has turned the best sport in the nation into a coed t-ball league for cry baby 5 year olds.  a league where even if you play the likes of say, u c davis or southeastern st university of chicken pluckers, and beat them.  why, by golly, you can play in the national championship game.  you went 12 and oh with your patsy schedule of third and fourth tier cupcake schools.  well done.  oofa.  

i’m sorry.  i don’t want to see it.  at all.  you can have your t-ball for whinny third tier school athletic directors and their ilk.  i don’t want to see watered down college football games.  games where everybody must play.  games where nobody really wins.  games where there are no winners. just losers like us.  

you say, ‘but, john, that isn’t happening and won’t happen.’  yeah, right.  just give them a little more time.  a little more whining.  then just wait and see.  because you can soon count on some women’s college field hockey team playing boise st, in the beloved rose bowl, for the national championship of college football.

ridiculous you say?  why he’s been at the absolut trough again.  no kids, not yet, any the ways.  i just don’t appreciate diluted college football games.  diluted to the point of political correct parity.  diluted so even, the university of middle state teachers and boys choir affiliates, gets a shot at a bowl game at the end of the college football money rainbow.  god, the horror.

sadly, i’m beginning to lose interest in college football.  oh, i’ll stick around for awhile.  but in the not so distant future i see myself voting with my feet and walking away from the game.  politicians making changes they have no business making.  there’s just too much excess money out there.  and that money along with dumb ass politicians and stupid college officials is ruining the game i used to love so very much.  it’s a part of brave new world?  no thanks.  you can have it.

so just what have the hairballs in dc done?  they got just who the hell ever of the bcs hairballs to adjust their computers to look favorably upon third tier schools ala boise st.  in all fairness, cincinnati is probably a second tier school as they have a very good medical school on the campus.  they just ain’t harvard or yale and just as well as those guys can’t compete either.

the point being, boise st, a third tier school has diddly for academics and can recruit kids that can play but then said kids are morons who could never get into an sec, big 10 or pac 10 school.  which doesn’t matter much in the academic sense.  not that the kids from michigan or usc go to class all that much.  it’s a fine line to be sure.  a line that for the sake of decent college football games that shouldn’t be crossed.  at least not while i’m still alive.  thank you.  point?  computers tweaked to nullify strength of schedule.

so just why are boise st and the bear cats sitting above usc in the bcs poll?  the sad reply from the masses is: usc lost a game and the other two haven’t.  they are undefeated.  fine.  ok, pilgrim, riddle me this: if usc were to play boise st this saturday, at boise, who would be the vegas favorite?  vegas cares only about the money.  their money.  the simple answer would be, usc.  probably by at least 14 points.  trust me, i’m sure that would be the case.  so why then is boise st and cincinnati ranked higher than usc?

yeah, i’m a usc homer and a pac 10 honk.  doesn’t matter in this regard.  he political correct crowd bought off by somebody or another to water down the game into a 5 year old coed t-ball league.  jesus.

this has been like all over the place and i suppose, maybe and hopefully, you can see my passion here.  and my point.  we are destroying a game, the only game left, that used to have some sort of meaning and purpose.  a meaning and purpose that is being watered down into nothingness.

count on this as well, a playoff mandated or brokered by the hairballs in washington, dc would be just as bad.  you would have to be certifiably insane to think otherwise.


a government by and for the people(?)

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one would think, things ought to be getting better as one gets older, but generally speaking, that’s far from the case.  the government we’ve come to know and for sure not love, just plods on like some sort of a brain dead basket case.  a government hanging on because no one bothered to fill out the, ‘do not resuscitate’, paperwork.  government by flat line.  yeah, sad but true.

the local yokels, i actually grew up with, are running shit around these parts now and they step into a pile of stinky dogie poop daily.  seems like they ought to know better.  also seems like they haven’t a clue someone is actually watching.  how odd is that?  more like stupid.  sad.  so sad.

they step on a nice steaming turd and think nothing of it until that said turd hits the damn fan.  hits the fan because someone is actually looking at what you lame ass numb-nutted humps are doing. 

you can’t get into stuff like, tony soprano, doing whatever the hell works, graft wise, and not think anyone isn’t watching or paying attention.  who’s dumber?  you?  or us?

names?  if you live here you know them.  they’re in the local fish wrap on a several times a week basis.  no point sticking them up here.  no, not yet. 

things will probably only be going from bad to worse now that arnold’s scams didn’t pass a few weeks ago.  the idiots here and up in the state capital are scrambling to find ways to figure shit out.  i doubt they will. 

i’ve said this before and, george will, god bless him, said it last week as well.  this sad stupid game is coming to your state sooner or later.  count on it.

so respectable.  get out of my life.  don’t take my wife.  no no no.

light a candle for america.

so, all that being said, and in the spirit of a government by and for the people, cheorkee parks, and myself, with a bit of inspiration from, dfr, have come up with a nice patriotic tee-shirt just in time for the coming july 4th holiday.

go to this link.  check it out.  then buy, buy, buy amarican!!!  please.





copyright 2009  cowboyzone enterprises




the late great state of chaos

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i’m a native of california.  my mother is a california native as well.  she’ll be 95 in september.  we have roots that go way the hell back.  we’ve seen any number of things.  my dad too, though he’s only been out here since 1941.  the brown eyed girl is a socal native.  she’s seen some shit too.  more shit just might hit the fan soon here in the late great state of chaos, california.

we pay our state senators and state assembly folks a lot of money.  plus they get some damn nice perks.  i wouldn’t mind that if they did what the fuck we paid them to do.  though they can’t seem to be bothered with doing that, their job.  their well paid job. 

it’s been a number of years and may even go back to governor moonbeam, jerry brown, who is actually thinking about running for the job again. however, that’s a drift of major proportions and for another time.  the point being, the tools we’ve elected just can’t come up with a budget for the state.  well, they can but they end up raising taxes as a result and then the taxes never ever go away like they said they would.  then they just waste the damn money they raised.  our money.  a vicious cycle if there ever was one. 

the assholes are paid to do something they can’t do.  fine.  quit.  go back to albertson’s and bag groceries or your cushy loan sharking job.  just get out and let somebody else try who ain’t gonna spend all their damn time collecting skim and graft from any asshole out there.  plus running for the damn re-election 24-7 like our current president.  more drifting.

ok.  so like the tools couldn’t come up with a budget again this year.  nothing new.  though this year, with other stuff in the dumpster, it wasn’t a good idea not to come up with one.  not that it ever is a good idea.  sooooo…the governator has called for a special election may 19th.  we get to vote on 5 propositions.  bleeding government by referendum.  it’s been like this here for far to goddamn long. 

referendum this referendum that, instead of doing WHAT THE FUCK THEY GET PAID FOR!!!!!!!  run the state like some sort of thinking person and not like it’s your personnal candy store.  enough of this, people.  screw it and them.  i’ve already sent my ballot in.  no, on every damn one of em.  sane folks are doing the same thing.  local newspapers are calling for the same.  the madness here in the late great state of chaos must come to a stop. 

california is the harbinger of this once great nation.  count on it.  we have been for years.  illegals?  among other things.  you got em now and their money for nothing attitude.  wake up, people!!!!!  take your country and state back from the money grubbing running for re-election 24-7, elected official, as a job description assholes.  that includes all of em!!!!!  vote them and their plague out of office.  stop the madness now.

damn, now i feel better.  tell you what, you’d all better heed the call and get wise before it’s too late.


the long slide

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i received this in an email this morning.  i’m re-posting it here with no one’s permission.  i doubt they’ll mind.  except for probably, mr. obama.  

You don’t have to be a military veteran to appreciate the sentiments expressed here.  But, if you are, and have served our Country, or have close family who DID serve or IS serving, this message may have even greater clarity.  Service personnel earn VERY LITTLE in comparison to what they sacrifice.  My apology to anyone who simply feels that this is ‘right-winged diatribe!”  Exam closely the spoken words.

Subject: Arrogant Americans

Arrogant Americans, Mr. President?
Peter Heck – Guest Columnist – 4/14/2009 7:50:00 AM

    As I was sitting in church waiting for the start of the service, my grandpa came walking towards me pointing his finger. No matter how old I get, and no matter how long he’s been out of the U.S. Navy, that’s still an intimidating sight. As he approached me, his voice quivered as he said, “We saved that continent twice…how dare my president apologize for this country’s arrogance.” My grandpa is right. Americans need not apologize to the world for their arrogance; rather, Americans should apologize to their forefathers for the arrogance of their president.

Barack Obama’s first foreign trip as President of the United States has confirmed the naiveté so many of us feared during the election cycle. But worse than that, it has also demonstrated that our president suffers from either a complete misunderstanding of our heritage and history, or an utter contempt for it. Neither is excusable.

    Garnering cheers from the French of all people, President Obama declared, “In America , there is a failure to appreciate Europe’s leading role in the world. Instead of celebrating your dynamic union and seeking to partner with you to meet common challenges, there have been times where America has shown arrogance and been dismissive, even derisive.” Consider that Obama spoke THESE words just 500 miles from the beaches of Normandy , where the sand is still stained with 65-year-old blood of “arrogant Americans.”

    Indeed, columnist Mark Whittington observes, “One should remind Mr. Obama and the Europeans how America has ‘shown arrogance’ by saving Europe from itself innumerable times in the 20th Century. World War I, World War II, the Cold War, and the wars in the Balkans were largely resolved by American blood, treasure, and leadership.” But all that appears lost on the president’s seemingly insatiable quest to mend fences he imagines have been tarnished by the bullish George W. Bush.
If Obama wishes to continue trampling the presidential tradition of showing class to former office holders and publicly trash Bush for his own personal gain, so be it. But all Americans should make clear that no man – even if he is the president – will tarnish the legacy of those Americans who have gone before us. Ours is not a history of arrogance. It is a history of courage, self-sacrifice, and honor.

    When abusive monarchs repressed the masses, Americans resisted and overthrew them. When misguided policies led to the unjust oppression of fellow citizens, Americans rebelled and overturned them. When millions of impoverished and destitute wretches sought a new beginning, Americans threw open the door and welcomed them. When imperial dictators were on the march, Americans surrendered their lives to stop them. When communist thugs threatened world peace, Americans bled to defeat them. When an entire continent was overwhelmed with famine and hunger, Americans gave of themselves to sustain it. When terrorist madmen killed the innocent and subjugated millions, Americans led the fight to topple them.

This is the legacy that generations of Americans have left. If President Obama seeks stronger relations with the world community, perhaps he should begin by reminding them of these very truths, rather than condemning his own countrymen on foreign shores.

    This “obsessive need to put down his own country,” has caused blogger James Lewis to call President Obama a “stunningly ignorant man” who has evidently never spoken to a concentration camp survivor, a Cuban refugee, a boat person from Vietnam, a Soviet dissident, or a survivor of Mao’s purges.

    Unfortunately, I can no longer bring myself to give Mr. Obama that benefit of the doubt. Not after looking at the pain in my grandpa’s eyes…a man who still carries shrapnel in his body from his service to this country.

    As a student and teacher of history, I recognize that America has made mistakes…plenty of them, in fact. But one of the great things about our people has been their courage and humility in admitting and correcting those mistakes. God willing, they will prove that willingness again in four years and correct the mistake that is the presidency of Barack Obama.